Dear Volodya
Golden Showers in Switzerland,
Here in Japan I have to address you as Putin-san publically. Thank God we are friends. And on Substack, I can just call you "Voldya."
Thank you so much for your reply to my letter-- which was very informative. Your recent speech included a lot of facts and details that have not been made public until now-- and are in direct contrast to the urinary incontinence afflicting the “piss conference in Switzerland.
Incontinence? Really – sort of a group "golden shower thing. They like this stuff.
Trudeau?
The Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau can’t play the piano with his penis. But he can shout "Slava Ukraini" —which in World War II was the Ukrainian version of “Sieg Heil”.
As a Canadian, I find this embarrassing. Fortunately, I am in Japan. If I said it in Canada, they would take away my tiny pension and mandate euthanasia – "dying with dignity"-- for which I have qualified having been diagnosed with ASD, not that anybody knows what that is.
Like “oppositional defiant disorder” for kids who don't do their homework.
Trudeau? Drama teacher? Or Drama Queen? I go with the latter .
He reminds me of his mother --who grew up in the same community as I did, with a lot of the same friends. My uncle. at the time. was a liberal politician—so I have something of an insider's point of view.
His mother was pretty like Justin — also an airhead – like him.
The trouble is Justin is not much better than the other Canadian politicians—indicating something wrong with Canadian political culture. We have four or five different parties in parliament-- Canada's version of Animal Farm. But the moment you get elected, your IQ drops 50%. Is political lobotomy a thing.
Maybe it’s the culture.
Politicians grow out of the culture-- or maybe you could say grow on a culture-- like that green stuff you see on two week old bread. Canadians and Americans just slather ketchup and mustard and mayonnaise on it and eat it. Tuned into CNN.
Back to the Peace Proposal
Your so-called "Peace Proposal" speech—which was so much more than that— offered a timeline of events and hitherto undisclosed details that cannot be objectively disputed. Therefore was dismissed by the leaders of the collective West without reading-- or consideration. Maybe it was the lack of pictures.
It was therefore masterstroke for you to release the details of the Istanbul agreement to the New York Times-- everything. Nobody knows if it was you of course. Maybe not even the New York Times. Wink, wink—if you have ever worked in the media you know how this works.
Authenticity is not determined by the "source" in any case-- but by the details, if they are verifiable—as they are in this case. +
The NYT report on Istanbul confirms everything that you say in your much ignored peace proposal, and indirectly confirm the other details that you provide about the whole conflict starting actually before 2014.
Murder most foul
Since the Collective West learns everything it knows from TV dramas, let explain this way….
The Ukraine was murdered. It was a hit, ordered by the US cartel– and his boss of bosses, Barack Obama. Think of the Ukraine is a family. There are a lot of kids, including an older brother who left home. He’s named Russia.
The US doesn't care about the Ukrainian family-- but Russia has been acting up, and needs to be taught a lesson.
To that end, the American mob has a goon squad nurtured for mayhem – the Galician neo-Nazis. They claim to be related to the Ukrainian family-- like cousins. Bad cousins —who covet family house and the garden, too.
The American Mafia visit the Ukrainian home pretending to bring wine and cheese and hand it's neo-Nazi thugs sharp knives to cut up some of the Ukrainian kids—if they are not given what they want — everything — which they will then give to the Americans who want to tear down the house and build condos.
There is resistance of course. Some of the kids are lying in pools of blood. The Americans of course wait until the media come and tell everyone that the violence was committed by the kids themselves under the influence of that bad older brother. Russia.
Since the Ukraine home is outside of police jurisdictions, the US and NATO can't deliver justice directly —so they empower the neo-Nazi , Galician cousins to exorcise the Ukrainian family-- with "extreme prejudice".
But now….
But now we know what really happened and who done what. But who has courage enough to go against the Mob?
Big Brother Russia has taken on the Cousins and soon they will be forced out. The rest of the world will see that it is possible to fight the cartel.
The world is tired of paying protection money to the American cartel. It is tired of being forced to accept their cultural fentanyl. It's tired of goons who come into their shops and take things and don't pay.
There ARE alternatives, and you Volodya have defined them.
With respect,
your friend,
Julian
Bears are usually pretty peaceable. Leave them alone and they will leave you alone. But never, EVER both a bear with its family.
The Russian bear is no different.
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As a Canadian I share your sentiments about Trudeau. The rest of our politicians are the same. Totally depressing. I enjoy your work though. So there’s hope
Now, having dealt with the riff raff below, thank you Julian. You are at your best in a satirical vein and this epistomological exchange with an imagined Pres Putin is top notch! It makes the lesson that idiots like @jrkrideau, a failed acronym for his employer I suspect, with whom the type tries to curry favor, are always with us and always to be shunned by the adults and uncompromised journalists in the room.